sk yourself if you think people find you attractive…
A lot of people think attraction is about looks, but it’s not. What it’s about is harnessing attractive traits that make people mesmerized by your presence. Nevertheless, we can be superficially attracted to someone, however most of the time it’s about their level of certainty, personality and degree of passion. The reality is that being attractive is about more than just how someone looks.
To clarify…
Having attractive traits is not just something we want in a mate, we also look for certain traits in people that we obviously choose to be around. For example, we have an idea for who is ideal for friendships. Maybe even a place we like to hang out; like for coffee or fun. We may judge a place by its location or the way it looks. Discovering what people find attractive will open some major doors about understanding what motivates people in general.
So in short, if you want to figure out how to make people like you, or want to be around you and spend time with you, then you must educate yourself diligently.
Whether we like it or not, most humans have short attention spans –We get bored fast and need some kind of cheap entertainment to keep us stimulated. And even if you are blessed with looks, it is not always going to get you the attention you may crave.
The kinds of things that most of us are attracted to stem from intrigue, engagement dealing with interesting people and things. Interesting enough, we tend to come across as boring when we are simply afraid to say something that we fear will make us look bad; or what we really think.
Whenever you take a guarded stand-point, you will typically fall into a bottomless pit of asking boring interview-like questions; that will quickly turn off the person you are hoping to impress. What we should be doing is sharing what we really feel, instead of worrying about getting judged so much.
What do you like in a girl?
Is it their hips?
Smile?
Intelligence maybe?
According to some sources mentioned later in this article, it has to do with your willingness to open up and show who you really are. After that, your potential suitors, friends or business partners can decide if who you are is who they want to associate with.
For friends it comes down to that person’s ability to invest in whatever it is that you have to say. In the corporate world it comes down to who is willing to do business and not go against your way of thinking.
So being closed off will not get you anywhere and you must be willing to connect. You must be willing to make yourself vulnerable and reveal your true-self. Be willing to role with the punches and accept that not everyone will like you.
However, as long as you aren’t afraid to open up to people and get to know them with sincerity; then you are sure to find people that are attracted to you. And when people see that you have friends, then they will follow the trend and be more willing to join in on your party as well.
*Fun Exercise*
Next time you are out at some kind of event I want you to make it clear that you are there to meet people. Verbalize it and tell people, “I’m glad to have met you, I am very eager to make some unique connections here.” Or even, “What a great event, I am here to engage with like-minded people for my business. I even brought cards. Do you mind if I share one with you?”
The way people function is by having stuff put in their face. For relationships, you have to make it clear to women that you are interested in them and for everything else; same deal.
Clarify, clarify, clarify!
Being true and open about what you want is the key to attracting more of the people you want in your life. Beating around the bush and being shy is just going to lead to a long, hard road to loneliness.
This is the truth and don’t listen to anyone that tells you otherwise. People choose what to think of you by the initial things that you say and do.
When we get rid of all the rapport and focus on the meat of attraction; it typically takes place within the first 30-45 seconds of an interaction. As much as ‘The Seduction Industry’ doesn’t like to admit it, people make their judgments for a mate, most of time, when they first meet you.
According to Helen Fisher, a Rutgers University Anthropologist that has studied many couples and the topic of attraction, we choose our mates relatively quickly. Also, our brains are well-developed for this task as well; meaning we are not wrong about our judgments the majority of the time (i.e. Think gut feelings).
In the world of platonic relationships and employment there was a study done by Nalini Ambady of Tufts University. She tested how accurate our first impressions are with teachers. She tape-recorded a group of 13 teachers while displaying those videos to random people.
She then had these people rate them. After that she compared the results to the teacher’s ending semester evaluations. Shockingly, their judgments were surprisingly accurate about who were more successful and viceversa.
Now for some useful tips on attractive body language…
Inviting body language is much more attractive than any suit, haircut or fancy car out there.
Here are some things to pay attention to the next time you are out…
Research has shown that we subconsciously close ourselves off ‘physically’ whenever we are feeling threatened or disturbed by someone. You don’t want to make someone that you are trying to attract think that you feel threatened by their presence. This will make them less likely to want to be around you; because no one likes to be around someone that doesn’t like them.
Research shows seeing someone’s hands will make them more comfortable around you. So take your hands out of your pockets and don’t be afraid to show them off.
People actually tend to show they are relaxed through the physicality of their body language. Naturally, a person who is comfortable with someone will never cross their arms or put their hands in their pockets. Those behaviors are nothing more than nervous tendencies. So conquer them and you will see your social, sex and business life begin to thrive.
*Bonus Tip*
If a woman is exposing her neck, their is a high probability that she is attracted to you.
On a final note…
Think back to all the times you’ve crossed your arms or have had your hands in those pockets…
Did the interaction go well?
If it didn’t, then I challenge you to not do this the next time you are out and see what kind of impact it has on people. Also pay attention to everything else I said about making a good first impression and not being afraid to say what’s on your mind.
Remember, you are never going to meet anyone worth your while if you are afraid to put yourself out there. So put yourself on display and don’t be ashamed of what you honestly think about anything.
Lastly, I bring another superb book for you all; some very useful material. This book is called…
“Take Me To Truth” by Nouk Sanchez
Just click the icon below to begin reading “Take Me To Truth” now.
Thanks for reading and don’t forget to subscribe to the GBTN Newletter!
-PUA Redsky
Follow @redsgy
I enjoyed the article. Thank you very much.
Good points Redsky. Thanks for sharing. Read “Take me to truth” as well. Great book! I found it to be a deep book on relationships and our own paradigms.
No prob, thanks for reading everyone.
Cool
I like the BL part. Sooo true.